Frankly Told: For You, Always
The cafe air was coated with the warm scent of baked goods and coffee. The weather seemed to agree with the feeling in his heart; as the sun set on a beautiful Thursday evening. It cast its crimson rays and painted the walls a soft pink.
On the small table for two sat a bouquet. Somehow, it had turned into one of those teen rom-com movies and he sat there giddy like a young boy. Outside the window, his wandering eyes caught sight of an elegant SUV that pulled up into the parking space in front of the building. It ignited his ambitions and he thought of the promise to one day drive one of those to the house where he and his wife lived with their children.
His delusions were cut short as he watched her step out of the car a few minutes in. The subtle smile faded from his lips and his heart slipped into his stomach. He knew what was coming and tried to brace himself for it. His stomach flipped over and over and his guts tied themselves into knots. She strutted onto the sidewalk and he pulled out his phone pretending that something more important had caught his attention so she wouldn’t think he was watching her walk in.
The taps of the high heels gave away her presence as she walked into the quaint establishment. He looked up to meet her eyes with a plastic smile. She smiled back at him and it killed him inside. He stood up and hugged her like he always did, exchanging a few pleasantries. Being as he was, he pulled out the seat for her before he went back to his own. He patted the flowers and looked into her eyes.
“These are for you,” he started.
“Oh, these are lovely!” she exclaimed, raising them to her face and deeply inhaling. “You really know your way around flowers.”
“Have you ordered yet?” she asked as she put the flowers to the side.
“Nah, I told them I was waiting,” he admitted. “I just had a glass of water, I hope that’s okay.”
“Is it?” she asked almost insultingly. “I texted you that I’d be late, I thought you’d get yourself something.”
He scoffed and shook his head.
“Then what is the point of this?” he pushed. “The whole essence of a ‘coffee date’ and that.”
Right as she opened her mouth to say something, one of the waitstaff walked up to their table with a notebook in hand, wearing a smile like it was part of the uniform.
“Ah, is this her?” she started.
“Yes, this is her,” he responded, almost proudly.
“You look amazing, I love your dress,” the waitress threw in a quick compliment.
“Thank you,” she responded, half-surprised by the comment.
“What can I get you today?” she switched into work mode.
“I will have some tea, white… maybe chamomile if you have some,” he said cooly.
“What about you?” the waitress turned to her.
“Do you have some hot chocolate or something?” she asked.
“Yes, we do,” the waitress quipped almost immediately.
“I guess I’ll have one of those,” she said.
“You should try their muffins, they are really nice,” he insisted. “Let’s get like four?”
The waitress nodded and wrote it down before walking away, leaving them to themselves again.
“Eh, mwenyeji mwenyewe,” she teased.
“Ah, it’s not like that,” he drew maps on the table with his finger. “I just used to pass by here a lot when I was on campus and well, she is the owner.”
“Mh, okay,” she responded sarcastically.
The conversation drifted into banter with a side of current affairs. Their orders were brought and as they dug in, they drew the exchange over several hours. He ordered a plate of chips to split between the two of them as they continued to talk well into the night. Around them, the stream of customers coming in and out disappeared into the background, save for the few who were dragged into the gossip by the way they dressed or whatever inconsequential thing they could pick out.
The bill came and he quickly picked it up.
“Allow me,” he said, as he pulled out his phone to pay.
She sat there in silence, picking out the last of their shared plate of chips. When he was done, the waitress took the plate with her and walked back to the counter.
“Shall we?” he said as he stood up, reaching out his hand for her to use to get up.
As they walked out, he waved to the team behind the counter and rushed to get the door before she got there and as she walked through she teased him again.
“Such a gentleman,” she said.
He simply scoffed and walked out behind her. He immediately felt the chill set in and draped his jacket over her shoulders without thinking twice. He nodded as he adjusted it neatly on her before he dug his hands in his pockets and walked off with her by his side. They walked through the city in smooth-flowing conversation under the streetlights and office buildings.
“That was a good first date,” he commented as they got to her bus stop.
“I guess it was,” she agreed. “Sorry about the lateness, again.”
“Understandable. It’s a working night,” he waved it off. “We should do this again sometime, say next weekend?”
She pressed her lips together in a tight line. Opening her mouth to speak, he knew what was coming and held his own. The whole time in the cafe he picked up little fragments that solidified his resolve. Whatever words came from her mouth after didn’t matter and he would probably forget them when he turned away.
“… I say all this to say,” he caught the last of her words. “I don’t think I want a relationship right now.”
“I see,” he said. “That’s fine.”
“It is?” she asked with a sigh of relief. “I didn’t know how you would take it. Hearing that... We can still be friends, right?”
“Nah, I’m good,” he curtly responded and she was gobsmacked.
“Look, my feelings don’t often change and my heart already sees you as more than friends,” he spoke to her silence. “I can’t stand here and tell you that I’ll get to a point where I won’t have these feelings for you. Being in your presence won’t kill them either because truthfully… for you, always. Always they will stay.”
“I can’t do unrequited love ever again so thank you but no,” he insisted.
“Get home safe,” he hugged her and took his jacket as the bus pulled up beside them and people began to get in.
He gestured to it and smiled.
“For you.”
